February 10, 2006 05:27 PM
I'm Just Not Feelin' the Love
During my last two years of college, I worked for my university's information and publications department. The pay was crappy, but they treated the student writers (five of us) pretty well. They gave us lots of freedom to come and go as we pleased, as long as we followed two rules: turn in a well-researched article each Friday, and keep the university in the news. (For positive reasons, of course.) Our articles were sent to newspapers all over the region, as well as to the AP and UPI wire services.
I needed to build up my portfolio of published articles, so I was always looking for great story ideas. One February, my roommates and I were lamenting the fact that Valentine's Day was coming and none of us had a decent guy to share it with. So I started wondering if people got more depressed on this day. I'd heard that depression around the holidays is often higher than usual in the U.S., but I thought this referred to the holidays in November and December. I wondered if Valentine's Day could be more than just a little annoying if you didn't have a sweetheart. I wondered if it was actually bad for your mental health.
I visited a few psychology professors, a clinic, and some counselors, and their overriding message was clear: Valentine's Day can contribute to depression and anxiety. Most of the people I interviewed for this story were quick to say that if a person was stable and happy with their life, not having a romantic interest on Valentine's Day wasn't going to make them suddenly depressed. The real problem seemed to be that Valentine's Day could reinforce pain and loneliness in a person who was already feeling lonely and sad. Basically, it could make a bad situation a worse.
I interviewed one professor who has said something that I still remember, although almost 20 years have past. He suggested it would be much better for our collective mental health if adults treated Valentine's Day like small children treat it. Remember kindergarten, when you shared Valentine's Day cards and candy with everyone in the class? He suggested that if we adults could make the day not just about romance but about friendship as well, we might all be better off. And I just love that idea.
Comments
Being happy with myself, still feel a bit sad when seeing all those ads with happy couples & Valentine's surprises or reading the romantic stories about real couples. I say God is love, and love is God in action and what the world needs now is love, sweet love...so choose Valentines day as my spread Love day, not just to family/friends, but to co-workers, dis-liked neighbors, strangers on the bus.
Posted by: mary at March 2, 2006 01:40 PM
