July 28, 2007 07:21 PM
43 (Almost) and Counting
I'm turning 43 next week, and I'm feeling like this whole being fortyish deal is really hitting me. Being 40 was a novelty, and 41 and 42 felt kind of like I was just trying something new out, like flirting with a man but not dating or marrying him or anything serious. But now that the novelty has worn off and my flirtation with my forties is fading, I feel like turning 43 is a good time to commit. Or accept. I've always been an advocate of embracing your forties and beyond, so I'm not quiet sure why I even need to do this. Still, I find myself standing on the edge of my fourth year in this decade and I'm, well, just the teensiest bit anxious.
It all hit me last night when my husband and I were discussing retirements plans. Retirement plans. Hold on, isn't that something for old people, like my father's age? Oh, wait, he's 81. He has been retired for more than 15 years now. Nope, retirement plans are one of the things I need to think about. And I realized I need to do more than just love my forties and look as fabulous as I can. It hit me that there comes a time in life when you (or at least I) must graciously admit that old age is imminent, and that it's coming up pretty quickly. It's time to think about, plan for it, and not just look fabulous, but also feel fabulous in every way--physically, emotional, maybe even spiritually. I like to sort of take stock of my life and its general direction on each birthday, but this year, it seems a little different. Like there's more at stake. Is it because my oldest child is turning 18 this year and heading off to college next fall? Because my sister's health problems have made me think about my own health and how much I could improve it? I don't know. Maybe it's those things and other things.
So...43 in a week. My life, part 2. What will it be life? Will I be able to pull this off?
Stay tuned to find out...
